Passive-agressive

Thank you for calling, but fuck you.

If this were an emergency like [insert humorous emergency presented callously], there would be someone on the phone. Instead, continue to listen to this crappy music and wait for another arbitrary length of time.

If this is an emergency, call 9-1-1 or just let nature take its course and weed out the unfittest.

**

Is it terrible that this post amuses me so much?

Comments

Ostrich

Too afraid to stand and fight; Too much pride to fly away. Cowardice: immobilize Egos lacking skill to play! Games of conflict can’t be played By those afraid to deal a hand. Flightless birds avoid their call Ostriching heads in the sand. Thanks, Trifecta for the prompt, which requested an animal name be used as a verb. I figured I might as well ignore the dictionary and make my own...flightless birds have always intrigued me, anyhow.

It's time to start writing again. Maybe not blogging about window shopping and crazy thrift finds and social commentary but something to keep my head from exploding with all these thoughts. I have too many blogs that I've started and stopped and I am trying to find an island of persistence. Something that doesn't erode away. Not sure where that it but I'm sure that path lies down a bed of words. That I won't have any gasoline left in my tank unless I find a reason to use it. I lost the meat phoenix there (haha, "metaphor" but I can't type and my phones autocorrect is nonsensical). No, I lost the metape or but I am not going to self-edit because being conscious of the act of writing while acting it out makes the magic disappear. And the magic rug revert to a dingy old thing only good to dust the dust under. So I am writing without purpose without a destination in mind. Writing until I move myself to something else. A few minutes is better than not...

Masquerade

I suppose I should feel fortunate. I've been with the same man for six years, I've worked for the same company for nine years, I've lived in the same state for ten years. But my college diploma says "English" and my job screams "Business" and I fear that this life I’ve built is Stagnation masquerading as Stability. I’m not planning on doing something drastic like running off to join the circus or the Scientologists or anything, but maybe I should just stop planning for a change. Stop standing still. Do something spontaneous. I am too young to feel this old. --- Thanks for the 100 Word Song prompt, Lance (of My Blog Can Beat Up Your Blog ). This brief introspection was inspired by Elvis Costello's "Brilliant Mistake".

One-A-Day

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