Friday, July 7, 2006

Fireproof

Torn between the right and the desirable,
I ache to turn towards to fire but
My infinidecimal wisdom tells me to back away.
I'm not ready.  My heart is weak, my brain washed
Into believing what I need is among the ashes.
But ashes fly away on the wind, carried away
To other lands, into other hands not my own.
Deep inside my aching heart, the knowledge resides:
Until I'm strong enough to stand alone,
I cannot find a crutch to help me stand.
But once I have this crutch,
I am fireproof and can embrace the flames.

Don't

Don't pity me.  Don't worry for my mental well-being.
I've handled skeletons I'd rather not discuss.
I've soared so high and crawled so low.
I am strong, buoyant, resilient.
Don't pity me.
Support me - don't smother me -
I am capable of great things.

Am I?

Am I bitter?  Very well could be?
Am I depressed?  Occasionally?
Am I lonely?  Only in crowds?
Am I lost? Just confused?

It's called growth...the germination of the seed of life, shocked to feel the moist earth (is this real?).  Give me sun, water...I will grow to great heights when I break through the soil

Star dance

Rat-tat-tat-tat-tat.  Rat-tat-tat-tat-tat.  Percussive fingernails tapping a rhythm discordant with the cacophany within her head.  She's too big to make herself feel so small.  She aches to take flight and soar through the moonlit sky, dancing with the stars on her way to her haven.  She knows, with every bone in her body, that this is just a bump in the path...but the bump reminds her of her frail frame and its fragility.  Life used to be SO EASY...simple addition led to simple algebra...to simple calculus...to an IMPOSSIBLE life.  Why is she so melodramatic - for the sake of the art?  Pain makes for good stories - afternoon talk shows have taught her that much.  Is she unhappy?  No, never that.  More uncomfortable than anything, she tells herself...so many un-'s.  Uncomfortable, unsure, uneasy...but unafraid.  She will dance with the stars from solid ground tonight.

Two lines

In everything...avoidance is easier.
Imagination makes severance easier.