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brainstorm

golden rays of sunlight
strained by our intertwined fingers
the scuffed plastic of the lounge chairs
maybe i'll ponder the source of their ruggedness one day.
the surface of the pool aches for something to break its smoothness
yet all i can do is trace your lines,
looking for something new.
the novelty of you attracted me that day,
but what is it today that makes me continue my pursuit?
there is something within you that makes me question myself.
is there something more beyond that hill?
i continue to trudge up its incline
with no goal in sight.
i move to move, numbness encircling me.
but i feel when you enter my mind.
come back again and set me afire.

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You stay silent, so afraid to engage, in fear that you'll go getting carried away. ** I'd rather have your hatred than your apathy / apathetic ambivalence. Your indifference is more painful than your ire. ** Give me anger, just don't give me fake smiles / plaster a smile on your face (to appease me) ** Your indifferent posture hurts much more than your ire ** Just going through the motions, I'm an empty husk when you look at me. ** I can't have it all, but I want you to have a chance to ** Not knowing if you're okay makes it hard for me to be. ** The indifference differential / different / indifferent ... [word play] ** Crucial crushing credibility [word play] ** Wonderful wind tremble fright things pretty in daylight go bump / sound scary / take harrowing looks into your soul at night