Rat-tat-tat-tat-tat. Rat-tat-tat-tat-tat. Percussive fingernails
tapping a rhythm discordant with the cacophany within her head. She's
too big to make herself feel so small. She aches to take flight and
soar through the moonlit sky, dancing with the stars on her way to her
haven. She knows, with every bone in her body, that this is just a bump
in the path...but the bump reminds her of her frail frame and its
fragility. Life used to be SO EASY...simple addition led to simple
algebra...to simple calculus...to an IMPOSSIBLE life. Why is she so
melodramatic - for the sake of the art? Pain makes for good stories -
afternoon talk shows have taught her that much. Is she unhappy? No,
never that. More uncomfortable than anything, she tells herself...so
many un-'s. Uncomfortable, unsure, uneasy...but unafraid. She will
dance with the stars from solid ground tonight.
You stay silent, so afraid to engage, in fear that you'll go getting carried away. ** I'd rather have your hatred than your apathy / apathetic ambivalence. Your indifference is more painful than your ire. ** Give me anger, just don't give me fake smiles / plaster a smile on your face (to appease me) ** Your indifferent posture hurts much more than your ire ** Just going through the motions, I'm an empty husk when you look at me. ** I can't have it all, but I want you to have a chance to ** Not knowing if you're okay makes it hard for me to be. ** The indifference differential / different / indifferent ... [word play] ** Crucial crushing credibility [word play] ** Wonderful wind tremble fright things pretty in daylight go bump / sound scary / take harrowing looks into your soul at night
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