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Sometimes I Give In

Sometimes I give into temptation.
Why do I do what I shouldn't do?
Sometimes it all seems too impossible.
What keeps life from falling through?

Sometimes I don't give and I just take.
Why must I be such a greedy soul?
Sometimes I feel like I'm so unworthy.
Should I be allowed to walk on this world?

There's many wonders that lie untold,
Yet these are the ones that interest me.
You may not get the picture of it, but
In my life I find what all you cannot see.

Sometimes I give into people's pressure.
Why do I lack the power to say no?
Sometimes I feel like I've made no progress.
Why don't I have anything to show?

Sometimes I carry a blanket of loneliness.
Why do I always spend time all alone?
Sometimes I feel like I'm always at fault.
Why is it that I inflict this pain on my own?

There's many wonders that lie untold,
Yet these are the ones that interest me.
You may not get the picture of it, but
In my life I find what all you cannot see.

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You stay silent, so afraid to engage, in fear that you'll go getting carried away. ** I'd rather have your hatred than your apathy / apathetic ambivalence. Your indifference is more painful than your ire. ** Give me anger, just don't give me fake smiles / plaster a smile on your face (to appease me) ** Your indifferent posture hurts much more than your ire ** Just going through the motions, I'm an empty husk when you look at me. ** I can't have it all, but I want you to have a chance to ** Not knowing if you're okay makes it hard for me to be. ** The indifference differential / different / indifferent ... [word play] ** Crucial crushing credibility [word play] ** Wonderful wind tremble fright things pretty in daylight go bump / sound scary / take harrowing looks into your soul at night

Masquerade

I suppose I should feel fortunate. I've been with the same man for six years, I've worked for the same company for nine years, I've lived in the same state for ten years. But my college diploma says "English" and my job screams "Business" and I fear that this life I’ve built is Stagnation masquerading as Stability. I’m not planning on doing something drastic like running off to join the circus or the Scientologists or anything, but maybe I should just stop planning for a change. Stop standing still. Do something spontaneous. I am too young to feel this old. --- Thanks for the 100 Word Song prompt, Lance (of My Blog Can Beat Up Your Blog ). This brief introspection was inspired by Elvis Costello's "Brilliant Mistake".